2012 was for sure the toughest year I have ever had to experience. Every piece of me fell apart in 2012 but I grew stronger and built myself back up! And now we are almost half way into 2013 already and I can honestly say it is the best year of my life for me so far! I am in such a great season in my life. Loving every minute of this journey. So what have I been up to this past year? Hmm..
Done a lot of spending time with my precious girls. The three of us. We have been creating a lot of special memories together. I am so thankful for the time I have spent with them. As I watch them grow.. they teach me a lot about myself as well. They are such a blessing. Raelyn is my little mommy's girl. She loves me so much and I wouldn't trade that for anything. Yeah, some nights she just wants mommy to hold her which makes dinner making on the stove quite difficult. But I love that she NEEDS me. She is the quiet, sweet, loving, tender one. But if you mess with her she will stand her ground! She definitely reminds me a lot of myself. Teagan, is my little firecracker. She is such a smart girl. She is such a big helper. The best big sister. Caring. She is independent. Free spirited and loves life. I love them both so much and thank the Lord that he chose me to be their mama!
I have also done a lot of spending time with God.. I am so thankful for our relationship. I am closer to the Lord now than I have ever been. I have always believed and always followed. But to actively seek the Lord in all you do is different. I always looked at the relationship my mother had with the Lord and always longed for it. Now I can finally say I am there. He is the first person I go to. The first person I want to tell anything to. He is my rock. My best friend! He has made me so strong and I am so proud of myself and how far I have come. All thanks to Jesus!
I have found out who my true friends are. And wow! I sure have some pretty incredible ones. They've loved me and cared for me and stood by me. You all know who you are and I am so thankful for your love and friendship. We all get busy as moms but I know that without hesitation each and every one of them would be there for me. And I hope they know I would do the same for them. We can go weeks or even months without seeing each other and yet nothing changes between us. Thank you friends! Doing this mom and life thing would be pretty hard without such a great support system!
I have found a truly great man. I prayed at the beginning of the year for the Lord to find me a man of God all in his perfect timing though. I had a fear that no one would love a divorced mom of two kids.. but I know that was just the devil speaking lies. I sure didn't think the Lord would act so fast on bringing me such a good one though.. ;) sure glad he did though!
I have done a lot of soul searching, finding out who Melissa really is. I am starting cosmetology school next week! Something I have always wanted to do but let fear stand in the way. Fear of not thinking I could be good enough. Made excuses about not having enough time. And now being a full time working mom I thought I couldn't handle school, work, and still be able to be a good mom. I still do have a bit of Mommy guilt that I wont have as much time for my girls as I do now but I know that it is only temporary. I know that they would want mommy to go after her dreams! I have learnt that if you want anything in life you have to go after it yourself. Set fear aside and dream big! So here I go.. Wish me luck!
